I thought I would dummy up a letter that is free for anyone to use if they so wish (for private and personal use only.. well you have to love a disclaimer!), to seek clarification on matters of the heart or whatever.
To Whom It May Concern,
I am writing to you, kindly requesting that you clarify your position on the matter of us.
It has come to my notice that your attentions are somewhat lacking. As my virtues are widely known, I cannot fathom why at this very moment you are not knocking on my door requesting my company for tea, or dare I say, even asking for my hand in marriage. I think it a matter of good breeding that you are forthright, in a round about and respectful way, and communicate to my humble but exceptionally good self your intentions.
When it comes to matters of the heart one must neither tarry nor dawdle; for the heart that one may have set upon, is not promised to wait forever for words and promises unspoken.
So it is with great reluctance that I seek an end to this game of waiting, and respectfully ask that you clarify where your thoughts lie in the matter of my heart. Please respond promptly but with the tact and consideration that befits a person of your stature.
A very big thank you goes to my mate John B G for his spelling and grammar checking skills.