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Monday, August 13, 2018

Don't look back in Anger

Each month a friend and I take it in turn to chose a theme, to come up with something creative to post on Instagram. Usually I post a photograph. But this months, theme, chosen by my friend Jules 'Don't look back in anger', made me think about doing something different. Here is my contribution (shared here, because Intsagram is not good for long text posts, and try as I did, I couldn't fix the crap formatting.

Don't look back in anger:

“Don’t look back in anger”, they said. Your anger makes us feel uncomfortable. Your anger scares us.  Your anger is not needed. It is vulgar.

The truth is they don’t know what to do with my anger, it is too real. My anger is a reminder of what they failed to protect me from, from that which has deeply scarred me. The truth is, my anger helped me survive. My anger stopped me ending my life. My anger gave me the strength to make it to the other side. The truth is, my anger is a flag, it yells and draws attention to those that hurt me, to those that ‘got away with it’, there were no consequences for them. My anger reminds this society and the individuals in it, that they failed me, as they failed and still fail many others.

“Don’t look back in anger” they say, sipping their lattes and brunching away. Don’t you want to be happy? Can’t you move on?   Can’t you let it go, or forget about it? These demands, openly disguised as questions, make them as guilty as those who hurt me, who abused me. It makes them complicit in covering up the acts and shows them as colluding. They may as well have held me down those many, many times.

Don’t tell me to stop looking back in anger. Don’t. 

I am not responsible for your feelings of uncomfortableness. I am not responsible for your fear of my anger. I get it. I really do. The truth is, that you don’t know how to sit with my anger and my hurt.  That is ok, I don’t expect you to.

‘But, haven’t you been angry for long enough now?’ they ask.  Disappointed, I gently shake my head from side to side and reply ‘No’.





copyright matthew schiavello 2017

Tuesday, May 8, 2018

35mm Film

I have been busy working away on photography, both digital and analog photography.

Here is some recent 35mm film photography, I had scanned in.


AK and I, exploring (#19).
Ilford FP4 plus, 35mm film. 
Taken in mid 2017.



AK and I, exploring the city.
Kodak Gold 200, 35mm film. 

Taken in late 2017.



These next ones are triple exposures, where I took three images, one over the other (all in camera). Crop and post editing processing (slight tweaking) done on the computer.


April 2018 Image #02
(Positive version)
Camera: Nikon FM10
Lens: AI Micro-Nikkor 1:2.8 55m
Film: Kodak Portra 160




April 2018 Image #4

Not sure what happened here, but my 35mm scanner can't seem to handle too much saturated color in film negatives and sometimes does weird, unexpected things.

Camera: Nikon FM10
Lens: AI Micro-Nikkor 1:2.8 55m
Film: Kodak Portra 160



April 2018 Image #8
Camera: Nikon FM10
Lens: AI Micro-Nikkor 1:2.8 55m
Film: Kodak Portra 160




April 2018 Image #68
(Positive version)
Camera: Nikon FM10
Lens: AI Micro-Nikkor 1:2.8 55m
Film: Kodak Portra 160

 




all work, copyright matthew schiavello 2018

Saturday, February 17, 2018

Working away

A friend recently asked if I was in a creative slump as he hadn't seen much output from me.
I smiled and told him that I am busy working away, creating new work and exploring new mediums (I am also posting regularly on instagram, Ello and tumblr).

I have taken so many photos, that I am still slowly working my way through images I captured at the start of 2017, as well as working my way through mixed-media pieces I created in 2015 & 2016!

Here are some things I have been working on recently.
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"Middle age, an autoportrait. Also known as- trying out my old 20mm film lens, on my full frame camera."  I took this as i decided to brush the cobwebs of an old 20mm film lens I had. This image is only from a few weeks ago.
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‘A poppy′
140117.
This image was from January 2017. This one has been flipped upside down.
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Country landscape  #330
311216.
This was taken somewhere near the South Australian/Victorian border as we drove home from an interstate holiday in Adelaide over Christmas 2016.
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Yellow Lines  #22 171016 . Taken in October 2016, somewhere in the city of Melbourne.
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Twilight over the Macedon Ranges #46 
141017.  Taken in October 2017. I took a series of these images, there is something so lovely about wide country vistas and twilight.
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‘What makes me a man? #113 190217′
“I lie about the size of my cock. I say it is much bigger than it is, it makes me feel like I am more of a man, stronger, more powerful.”

This piece from a series in Feb 2017,  aims to explore aspects of toxic masculinity. .

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The agony of non-acceptance (v).  From a conceptual series taken in February 2017.
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Self Portrait #11 170417  . A self portrait taken in April 2017.
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'cock iii'
(for the Laird's art comp)

Acrylic and graphite on paper. 2017. I completed three works for a gay art comp.
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Seminal works Outtake
‘Seminal works #02 070116′.  An outtake from the Seminal works series.  Scanned experimental work with Semen, ink and watercolour. The project catalogue, which talks about the project in depth can be downloaded  from this page: https://www.matthewschiavello.com/other-projects/

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Spit #07  130316  . Scanned experimental works, using Spit (Saliva), watercolor and Ink.
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‘The Leanover (in red, white and yellow’)', 2018. 20 x20 inches.. acrylic and graphite on canvas. Self framed.( i-phone photograph)
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all work, copyright matthew schiavello 2018

Friday, July 28, 2017

Exhibition

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I am in Group Exhibition at:
STEPS Gallery.
62 Lygon St, Carlton (up Near Trades Hall and RMIT).
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My work will be alongside the works of the very talented Judy Bartosy, and Christine Georgiou.
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Opening event- Sunday 6th August, 2-5pm.
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Then daily 11am-4pm, from Tuesday the 8th until Wednesday the 16th August 2017.
*note the gallery will be closed on Monday the 7th of August.
*note the gallery will be open till 6pm on Wednesday the 16th of August.
. I will also be sitting at the Gallery on Friday 11th of August (11am-4pm), Sunday the 13th of August (11am-4pm) and Wednesday the 16th (11am-6pm), if you wanted to pop in and say hello.
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kind regards,
matthew schiavello.

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I will have over 20 pieces of photography, mixed media and paintings there.
Here is some of my work.
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all work copyright matthew schiavello 2017

Monday, December 5, 2016

mixed media experimental works

here are some recent mixed media experiments I am working on. Perhaps for an exhibition or something else!








all images copyright matthew schiavello 2016

Wednesday, November 16, 2016

Almost forgotten

Here are some abstract photographs I had taken mid last year and almost forgotten all about.








These are imaginatively titled - 'Fences':






All images copyright matthew schiavello 2015-2016

Wednesday, November 2, 2016

The Smiths: 50 greatest songs: pt 2

Recently MOJO magazine listed the 50 greatest Smiths songs. Here is the second and final part of that list, including some videos.

Here is the rest of Mojo's 50 greatest Smiths songs, from 20-1.




20. Girl Afraid
19. The Headmaster Ritual
18. The Boy With A Thorn In His Side
17. Stretch Out And Wait
16. Shoplifters Of The World Unite
15. Bigmouth Strikes Again
14. I Know It's Over
13. Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want
12. Last Night I Dreamt Somebody Loved Me
11. Back To The Old House
10. Still Ill
9. Hand In Glove
8. Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now
7. Panic
6. William It Was Really Nothing
5. Reel Around The Fountain
4. This Charming Man
3. There Is A Light That Never Goes Out
2. The Queen Is Dead
1. How Soon Is Now?