Letter to a person who does not respond in like.

I thought I would dummy up a letter that is free for anyone to use if they so wish (for private and personal use only.. well you have to love a disclaimer!), to seek clarification on matters of the heart or whatever.





To Whom It May Concern,



I am writing to you, kindly requesting that you clarify your position on the matter of us.

It has come to my notice that your attentions are somewhat lacking. As my virtues are widely known, I cannot fathom why at this very moment you are not knocking on my door requesting my company for tea, or dare I say, even asking for my hand in marriage. I think it a matter of good breeding that you are forthright, in a round about and respectful way, and communicate to my humble but exceptionally good self your intentions.

When it comes to matters of the heart one must neither tarry nor dawdle; for the heart that one may have set upon, is not promised to wait forever for words and promises unspoken.

So it is with great reluctance that I seek an end to this game of waiting, and respectfully ask that you clarify where your thoughts lie in the matter of my heart. Please respond promptly but with the tact and consideration that befits a person of your stature.



respectfully yours,



....................





A very big thank you goes to my mate John B G for his spelling and grammar checking skills.

Wedding song.

Though I am getting closer to 40 each day and still single (yes... we all know that it is insane that there is war,disease and famine on this planet AND that the catch of the century is still single !!!), I do sometimes daydream about the day that I do finally marry the man of my dreams (well... assuming that it becomes legal to do so), I think about what song we will slow dance to. One of the hot contenders for my our (yes, I forget that its not all about me!!) wedding song is ‘All the way’ as performed by Jack Teagarden and written by Sammy Cahn and Jimmy Van Heusen.

So here is the soppy bit of the post, ignore it if you hate love or romance:

‘All the way’, every time I play this song I think of that special man who is out there somewhere, waiting for us to meet and to be together. I think of how lovely it would be for us to dance to this song on our special day. Dancing slowly and so close, when we are not cheek to cheek our eyes meet and our lips touch. When we whisper “I love you”, it means everything- it means ‘Through the good or lean years, and for all the inbetween years, come what may.’

All the way (written by Sammy Cahn and Jimmy Van Heusen)

When somebody loves you

It’s no good unless he loves you - all the way

Happy to be near you

When you need someone to cheer you - all the way

Taller than the tallest tree is

That’s how it’s got to feel

Deeper than the deep blue see is

That’s how deep it goes - if it’s real

When somebody needs you

It’s no good unless he needs you - all the way

Through the good or lean years

And for all the in between years - come what may

Who know where the road will lead us

Only a fool would say

But if you’ll let me love you

It’s for sure I’m gonna love you - all the way,

all the way

I couldn’t find a direct link to the tune on the internet, but if you go to http://www.myspace.com/jackteagardenjazz and look to the top right corner, you will see a playlist/jukebox, scroll down and find the song ‘all the way’, click on it (you may also need to press play). Sit back, close your eyes and imagine you are slow dancing with someone you love...or if you want to make it all about ME ( and who wouldn't), you can close your eyes and imagine you are at my wedding.

*** UPDATE !!!!!  My Brilliant Friend Ric send me the code to embed the tune into the Post YAY !!!
God Bless I.T. people !!  I think this pro-active effort makes Ric a friend for life to all Gay's.. and maybe even an honorary Gay!!! well the honorary gay thing will need to be discussed at the next general meeting that us gay's have.. I'll certainly make sure its an agenda item!.

Find more artists like Jack Teagarden at Myspace Music

the garden- Nov 2010

Today I had a well deserved day off work to... well... work in my garden, which I had been neglecting of late. I did a lot of work removing plants, tidying up, planting new plants/seedlings/vegetables etc..but rather than show you works in progress, I thought I would share some things that are blooming at the moment.

The Kangaroo paw are looking great and stand taller than me!!! 

The Roses are still blooming, still smelling wonderful and reaching ever skyward:

 Another type of Rose:

Broadbeans ready for collection:

My hand trying to get in the shot.... It has dreams of one day being a hand model:

Mulberries in various stages of maturity, the birds are having a feast on these:

 and one last picture, Yum!! I walk past this tree on my way to the front door and often can't help but pick a handful of berries to snack on:

selected writings- nonno (grandfather)

nonno (grandfather):

The past returns in fragments

and at the oddest times (like now).

Nonno’s dialect

my confusion

and inability to communicate,

his broken English

and dancing eyes.

Warmth exuded from him as we sat there in silence.

His hands were rough and well worn,

they seemed too big for his body.

I don’t know why I think of his hands.

He was a farmer

and loved his garden,

where we would sit in silence,

as the cancer ate at him from within.

© Matthew Schiavello 2009

All kinds of office wrong: The bum bag

There is someone at my work who, for whatever reason, insists on wearing a bumbag. Now i don't mean, while he is on holiday (and let me point out that, 'while on holiday' is by no means justification for wearing such an item), but I mean that he wears it to work, at work, at his desk, while walking about the office and whilst at meetings. Really, it is beyond a fashion faux pas, it is OUTRAGEOUS!. I have no idea how I will tackle this offensive behaviour, partly because the wearer of the offending item is my superior.

I did suggest to my best friend that I tackle him to the ground and wrestle the bumbag off him (you've seen the profile pic, and obviously I am a 5' 7 dreamer.. but this is about principles dammit!! I am prepared to put my life on the line to save all of us!), .. Obviously I would do this because I am a good Samaritan and want to save him further shame from his fashion folly, the fact that seeing the bumbag hurts my eyes, has nothing to do with my decision.
My best friend being who she is, suggested that I refrain from doing a good deed, and simply avert my eyes.... but its like a bloody accident.. I can't avert my gaze no matter how much I try!!!!
And.....the bloody bumbag is not even in his general bum area, it covers his crotch !!! which makes it even worse, because he doesn't even know how to wear the stupid thing!!!

I then suggested to my best friend that I rugby tackle him to the ground, in lieu of a wrestle.. but being who she is, she replied 'Bro, don't do it, eh!'..so I am left to ponder..
what if... 

What if I had wizarding powers like Harry Potter?

A simple Accio bumbag !!! would bring the offending item to me.. which I could then place in the 'general waste' rubbish bin ( no recycling for bum bags!!!), and no wrestle or rugby tackle will be required. If that didn't work, I am prepared to go one further and use the dreaded Avada Kedavra  curse, for death is not too extreme for the bum bag wearers of this world.. and do you know why?? Because looking at the bum bag being worn, makes me feel like i have been hit by the Crucio  curse!!!! Sure 'Avada Kedavra' is an unforgivable curse, But so is the Crucio  curse!! and knowing my luck, that bumbag wearer will probably use an Imperio curse on me when I least expect it and I'll suddenly don a bumbag myself!  Bloody hell!!!!!!  I am beginning to think these evil buggers cannot be beaten!!!

Adventures in an adult boutique- The Parody

I helped out at that place again recently.. you know the one...where european grandfathers haggle over $7.50 porn and women slam used faulty vibrators on the counter (oh wait... I haven't shared that story yet!)..  anyway, as nonplussed as I am, ( or should that be 'aren't' ?.. engrish never was my strong point), anyway...as nonplussed as I am by the stock.. I have to admit I LOVE  seeing the 'parody' porn titles that come in and have taken some pics of them to share with you all!!!!
As much as I LOVE Larry David and would date him in a flash and probably break up with him even faster, I don't know whether to laugh or be shocked by-'this ain't curb your enthusiasm' parody !! 

These next few are just too disturbing for me and my happy childhood memories!!! 

 Errrrr  I have to ask... 'Biggest Loser' parody porn??? WTF???  and as for 'Cheaters' Parody Porn.. That isn't that much of a stretch... but why?

Some more  TV show parodies to mess with your happy childhood memories... Oh the trauma !!!!

And Lastly..... this is a WTF and WHY ???  rolled into one... If I was to say anything else it would be- Thank the good Lord above that Daryl Sommers isn't in it!

The end of semester - Oh Joy!

Now that uni is over for the year, I clean up the mess that manifests at the end of each semester. The dining table has become a place to pile books and papers, as does the floor.
Now that the weight has been lifted off me, final papers submitted, this is all thats left...
A reminder of the stress of study.. I pack it all away.. I tidy, dust, wipe down, clean and then go out for a drink...to make merry... and i do!
This is the first time in a long while I have smiled and really laughed, from the belly, deep down...
Life is beautiful once more!!


Oh Joy!

I put my uni books away,
till next year
Oh joy!

The stress is put away,
as is the pressure
Oh Joy!

The expectations I create,
to do well and succeed
are replaced
with a smile.

Something old, Something new, Something borrowed and Something blue: Nov 2010

something old:

From 1968- Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell - 'You're All I Need To Get By'. Two legends who both died tragically, the story of Marvin's death is widely know, but Tammi, poor beautiful and talented Tammi died at age 24 due to a brain tumor.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EFqqgdhWEN8&feature=related

 something new:

Mark Ronson's latest couple of releases have really rocked my boat!!

Even if you don't like the tunes, the clips are great!!!

Mark Ronson & The Business International - Bang Bang Bang

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PzE5dS6fnFk&feature=channel

Mark Ronson & The Business International - The Bike Song

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mt_aKauLrjA&feature=related

something borrowed:

This is old school, for those of us old enough to remember it, and a great cover of the Marvin and Tammi tune that these two make their own.

Method Man Ft. Mary J. Blige - You're All I Need

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=siXunj15hKc&feature=fvw

 something blue: 

Two blues for you Both called 'Jungle Blues'.

The first one, well, Jellyroll, was born in 1885 and died in 1945, his 'jungle blues', from about 1927, is brilliant and reminds me not to forget the music that has come before, because it often has more to say than some of the stuff currently being released.

Ferdinand "Jelly Roll" Morton- Jungle Blues

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t6u9NtauHAc&feature=related

CW Stoneking was born in the Northern Territory to American parents (according to wikipedia) and now resides in Melbourne. I am not sure what to make of him, I love the music, but is it fake? Am I thinking too much about it, and should i just enjoy it for what ever it is?  The clip is a bit of a laugh because its so bad. OK correction, It's not a laugh, it just is.

CW Stoneking and the primitive horn orchestra- 'Jungle Blues'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jgncwm9cMio&feature=related

Healthy and brave choices

I am reminded that happiness like many things is a choice. Our days are full of choices, important, not-so-important and everything in-between. Sometimes the choices we make have healthy or unhealthy outcomes or impacts for us.

I consider three recent relationships.

Relationship #1:

Lovely man, aloof and not yet worked through his recent past relationship-including his partner leaving him. Yet I persist and ignore the glaring warning signs, because so many of his qualities are ones I value in a potential partner and I find him quite handsome. The alternative to persisting and living on the hope that he might come round, is living life alone.

Relationship #2:

Nice guy, but I found him boring to be with, as hard and as much as I tried to engage with him. Though I clearly knew this man was not for me, he was a nice person and cute. The alternative was living life alone.

Relationship #3:

An attached man I have seen on and off for a while. Our relationship is not healthy and we hurt each other in many ways. While I did once love him, now it is obvious that we just see each other for sex, though on some level, I am sometimes in denial about this. The truth is, the alternative is to be alone.

Sometimes it’s easier or safer to take a ‘better the devil we know, than the devil we don’t know’ approach with our choices. Sometimes we are so desperate not to face a perceived alternative (in these cases, being alone) that we forge on with a decision, all the while knowing it’s not a healthy one. And sometimes, sometimes we simply delude ourselves that what we have is healthy.

Sometimes we betray and lie to ourselves, believing that we cannot do anything different or even dream of a better situation. Sometimes, sadly, we believe that we don’t deserve better. These are times when we are our own worst enemy, barring our own path to happiness. But it doesn’t have to be like this, not when our days are full of choices.

Sometimes it’s as simple as just saying it out loud. Just opening our mouths and letting the truth that so desperately wants to be known, to revel itself. Sometimes it’s as simple as just dropping our shields of fear, that have done anything but protect us, to allow in the truth with its message of liberation. Sometimes the message smarts a little, sometimes it makes us smile (that cheeky- ‘I knew that’ smile), and sometimes if we are lucky it leaves us a gift of wisdom, sometimes.

As for me, what will I do? I might take my own advice for a change, breathe deep, let go, and bravely take a step into the unknown, into my new tomorrow.

The race that stops a nation.

I was thinking about the ‘race that stops a nation’- The Melbourne Cup. It brings punters out from everywhere to place their yearly bet, to hold Bar-b-ques, it’s an opportunity for men and women to dress up 'all nice' and attend the Race, hopefully invited to a marquee, to drink too much, and as is the sad case, be seen to leave –staggering about with shoes in hand, and much worse for wear. This one day creates jobs, milliners create hats, outfitters create outfits and sales of booze skyrocket…  Horses have names such as ‘So you think’, ‘Profound beauty’, Precedence’ and ‘Shocking’. The Age newspaper reports that one betting agency is expecting to turn over about 100 million dollars today. This is just one betting agency. I can’t help but feel uncomfortable with all of this. Sure we need fun, revelry, Bar-b-ques, hats, fashion and booze, but why does the word ‘excess’ spring to mind?

I work with people for who just a few extra dollars, would make a world of difference to them. The Main race today, race seven- ‘the Melbourne cup’, has a prize pool of 6 million dollars, this is just one of ten races. I can’t help but wonder how we might still have fun, enjoy life, laugh, have a drink, a bar-b-que, dress up, look great and channel some of this money to those who really need it. The 100 million dollars that just one of the betting companies is expecting to turn over… well…lets be honest, how many of us place a bet and win? If just half of this money went to those in need, how much better would cup day be for all of us? 50 Million dollars, WOW!!! How much good could be done with that? How much happiness, joy and hope could it bring to others less fortunate and in need, and we could still place our losing bets at the race track and have some fun.  Every one’s a winner! 

It’s a fact that when it comes to fund raising and charities, children’s charities capture more hearts, and do much better than fundraising for homeless alcoholics or drug users. Even saying that, The Royal Children’s Hospital ‘Good Friday Appeal’ this year raised a record 14.4 Million Dollars!!!. When we compare that amount to all the money that will be spent today on the ‘race that stops a nation’ I wonder what this says about us as a nation and our priorities.