Letter to a person who does not respond in like.

I thought I would dummy up a letter that is free for anyone to use if they so wish (for private and personal use only.. well you have to love a disclaimer!), to seek clarification on matters of the heart or whatever.





To Whom It May Concern,



I am writing to you, kindly requesting that you clarify your position on the matter of us.

It has come to my notice that your attentions are somewhat lacking. As my virtues are widely known, I cannot fathom why at this very moment you are not knocking on my door requesting my company for tea, or dare I say, even asking for my hand in marriage. I think it a matter of good breeding that you are forthright, in a round about and respectful way, and communicate to my humble but exceptionally good self your intentions.

When it comes to matters of the heart one must neither tarry nor dawdle; for the heart that one may have set upon, is not promised to wait forever for words and promises unspoken.

So it is with great reluctance that I seek an end to this game of waiting, and respectfully ask that you clarify where your thoughts lie in the matter of my heart. Please respond promptly but with the tact and consideration that befits a person of your stature.



respectfully yours,



....................





A very big thank you goes to my mate John B G for his spelling and grammar checking skills.

Wedding song.

Though I am getting closer to 40 each day and still single (yes... we all know that it is insane that there is war,disease and famine on this planet AND that the catch of the century is still single !!!), I do sometimes daydream about the day that I do finally marry the man of my dreams (well... assuming that it becomes legal to do so), I think about what song we will slow dance to. One of the hot contenders for my our (yes, I forget that its not all about me!!) wedding song is ‘All the way’ as performed by Jack Teagarden and written by Sammy Cahn and Jimmy Van Heusen.

So here is the soppy bit of the post, ignore it if you hate love or romance:

‘All the way’, every time I play this song I think of that special man who is out there somewhere, waiting for us to meet and to be together. I think of how lovely it would be for us to dance to this song on our special day. Dancing slowly and so close, when we are not cheek to cheek our eyes meet and our lips touch. When we whisper “I love you”, it means everything- it means ‘Through the good or lean years, and for all the inbetween years, come what may.’

All the way (written by Sammy Cahn and Jimmy Van Heusen)

When somebody loves you

It’s no good unless he loves you - all the way

Happy to be near you

When you need someone to cheer you - all the way

Taller than the tallest tree is

That’s how it’s got to feel

Deeper than the deep blue see is

That’s how deep it goes - if it’s real

When somebody needs you

It’s no good unless he needs you - all the way

Through the good or lean years

And for all the in between years - come what may

Who know where the road will lead us

Only a fool would say

But if you’ll let me love you

It’s for sure I’m gonna love you - all the way,

all the way

I couldn’t find a direct link to the tune on the internet, but if you go to http://www.myspace.com/jackteagardenjazz and look to the top right corner, you will see a playlist/jukebox, scroll down and find the song ‘all the way’, click on it (you may also need to press play). Sit back, close your eyes and imagine you are slow dancing with someone you love...or if you want to make it all about ME ( and who wouldn't), you can close your eyes and imagine you are at my wedding.

*** UPDATE !!!!!  My Brilliant Friend Ric send me the code to embed the tune into the Post YAY !!!
God Bless I.T. people !!  I think this pro-active effort makes Ric a friend for life to all Gay's.. and maybe even an honorary Gay!!! well the honorary gay thing will need to be discussed at the next general meeting that us gay's have.. I'll certainly make sure its an agenda item!.

Find more artists like Jack Teagarden at Myspace Music

the garden- Nov 2010

Today I had a well deserved day off work to... well... work in my garden, which I had been neglecting of late. I did a lot of work removing plants, tidying up, planting new plants/seedlings/vegetables etc..but rather than show you works in progress, I thought I would share some things that are blooming at the moment.

The Kangaroo paw are looking great and stand taller than me!!! 

The Roses are still blooming, still smelling wonderful and reaching ever skyward:

 Another type of Rose:

Broadbeans ready for collection:

My hand trying to get in the shot.... It has dreams of one day being a hand model:

Mulberries in various stages of maturity, the birds are having a feast on these:

 and one last picture, Yum!! I walk past this tree on my way to the front door and often can't help but pick a handful of berries to snack on:

selected writings- nonno (grandfather)

nonno (grandfather):

The past returns in fragments

and at the oddest times (like now).

Nonno’s dialect

my confusion

and inability to communicate,

his broken English

and dancing eyes.

Warmth exuded from him as we sat there in silence.

His hands were rough and well worn,

they seemed too big for his body.

I don’t know why I think of his hands.

He was a farmer

and loved his garden,

where we would sit in silence,

as the cancer ate at him from within.

© Matthew Schiavello 2009

All kinds of office wrong: The bum bag

There is someone at my work who, for whatever reason, insists on wearing a bumbag. Now i don't mean, while he is on holiday (and let me point out that, 'while on holiday' is by no means justification for wearing such an item), but I mean that he wears it to work, at work, at his desk, while walking about the office and whilst at meetings. Really, it is beyond a fashion faux pas, it is OUTRAGEOUS!. I have no idea how I will tackle this offensive behaviour, partly because the wearer of the offending item is my superior.

I did suggest to my best friend that I tackle him to the ground and wrestle the bumbag off him (you've seen the profile pic, and obviously I am a 5' 7 dreamer.. but this is about principles dammit!! I am prepared to put my life on the line to save all of us!), .. Obviously I would do this because I am a good Samaritan and want to save him further shame from his fashion folly, the fact that seeing the bumbag hurts my eyes, has nothing to do with my decision.
My best friend being who she is, suggested that I refrain from doing a good deed, and simply avert my eyes.... but its like a bloody accident.. I can't avert my gaze no matter how much I try!!!!
And.....the bloody bumbag is not even in his general bum area, it covers his crotch !!! which makes it even worse, because he doesn't even know how to wear the stupid thing!!!

I then suggested to my best friend that I rugby tackle him to the ground, in lieu of a wrestle.. but being who she is, she replied 'Bro, don't do it, eh!'..so I am left to ponder..
what if... 

What if I had wizarding powers like Harry Potter?

A simple Accio bumbag !!! would bring the offending item to me.. which I could then place in the 'general waste' rubbish bin ( no recycling for bum bags!!!), and no wrestle or rugby tackle will be required. If that didn't work, I am prepared to go one further and use the dreaded Avada Kedavra  curse, for death is not too extreme for the bum bag wearers of this world.. and do you know why?? Because looking at the bum bag being worn, makes me feel like i have been hit by the Crucio  curse!!!! Sure 'Avada Kedavra' is an unforgivable curse, But so is the Crucio  curse!! and knowing my luck, that bumbag wearer will probably use an Imperio curse on me when I least expect it and I'll suddenly don a bumbag myself!  Bloody hell!!!!!!  I am beginning to think these evil buggers cannot be beaten!!!

Adventures in an adult boutique- The Parody

I helped out at that place again recently.. you know the one...where european grandfathers haggle over $7.50 porn and women slam used faulty vibrators on the counter (oh wait... I haven't shared that story yet!)..  anyway, as nonplussed as I am, ( or should that be 'aren't' ?.. engrish never was my strong point), anyway...as nonplussed as I am by the stock.. I have to admit I LOVE  seeing the 'parody' porn titles that come in and have taken some pics of them to share with you all!!!!
As much as I LOVE Larry David and would date him in a flash and probably break up with him even faster, I don't know whether to laugh or be shocked by-'this ain't curb your enthusiasm' parody !! 

These next few are just too disturbing for me and my happy childhood memories!!! 

 Errrrr  I have to ask... 'Biggest Loser' parody porn??? WTF???  and as for 'Cheaters' Parody Porn.. That isn't that much of a stretch... but why?

Some more  TV show parodies to mess with your happy childhood memories... Oh the trauma !!!!

And Lastly..... this is a WTF and WHY ???  rolled into one... If I was to say anything else it would be- Thank the good Lord above that Daryl Sommers isn't in it!

The end of semester - Oh Joy!

Now that uni is over for the year, I clean up the mess that manifests at the end of each semester. The dining table has become a place to pile books and papers, as does the floor.
Now that the weight has been lifted off me, final papers submitted, this is all thats left...
A reminder of the stress of study.. I pack it all away.. I tidy, dust, wipe down, clean and then go out for a drink...to make merry... and i do!
This is the first time in a long while I have smiled and really laughed, from the belly, deep down...
Life is beautiful once more!!


Oh Joy!

I put my uni books away,
till next year
Oh joy!

The stress is put away,
as is the pressure
Oh Joy!

The expectations I create,
to do well and succeed
are replaced
with a smile.